Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex and relationship questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, record your question and send it to Q@Savage.Love, or call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savage.love and get yourself a subscription.

A married mother did some sex work in her younger, wilder days. She's turned on by money, so it seems obvious that she should be a findom.  But the typical clientele prefer a younger woman to take their money. How can she get her middle-aged kink on? 

Meanwhile, a gay man thinks porn is boooor-rrinnng! It's unrealistic, predictable and repetitive. Is there anything good out there?

Sometimes you get questions that can only be answered by a porn star. Fortunately, Dan knows some! We are delighted to welcome John Thomas to the show. (You may know him as "Best Bottom of 2021") The extremely charming and visually compelling Thomas, helps answer  questions about ethical porn production, the supply and demand differential between tops & bottoms, and the dark art of douching. A little of this gem is on the Micro, and the whole beautiful thing is on the Magnum. 



Q@Savage.Love              							206-302-2064



This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 27% off site wide. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Blueland. Going eco has never been easier. Revolutionary, refillable cleaning essentials eliminating single-use plastic. Right now,  get 15% off your first order by going to Blueland.com/Savage



Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From polyamory, to BDSM, gay rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

Savage Lovecast

Meet Europe's Best Bottom of 2021!

A man's 80 year-old father is getting scammed and extorted by a findom. Should he go to the police? Change his account numbers? See a marriage counselor? 

A gay man in his 20s looks very young. He worries that the men who are attracted to him may be skeezy because he looks more like a boy than a man. His friends tell him to work it. But how can he safely enjoy New York City's gay dating scene?

On the Magnum, a concerned mom wonders how to steer her teenaged kids toward ethical porn. We couldn't think of a better guest to bring on than Erika Lust- she's been making beautifully shot, thoughtful, sexy porn for 20 years. She and Dan talked about dealing with porn as a parent, how much porn is too much porn, and how adult content should NOT be in the hands of tech bros.

Finally, is it a consent violation to walk the streets with come visibly on your face?









It's a yes or no question. 

Q@Savage.Love            206-302-2064





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This episode is brought to you by Liberator: makers of pillows, shapes and furniture for new exciting sex. Go to Liberator.com/Savage or type “Savage” into the search bar for private VIP access to deals that are too good to announce on this podcast!

This episode is brought to you by Radical Relating: A Queer and Polyamory-Informed Guide to Love Beyond the Myth of Monogamy by Mel Cassidy. It’s a book on how to do poly better. US-based listeners can get 25% off on www.northatlanticbooks.com through September 2025 with code SAVAGE.











Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, obituary aficionado and creator of the It Gets Better Project. Bringing you the ups and downs and ins and outs of sex (with a dose of progressive politics,) since the ink dried on the Louisiana Purchase.

Dad’s Being SCAMMED by a Findom!

A woman's old friend and sometime lover asked her for a beaver shot to ease his stress on an upcoming couples trip. She obliged. Did he thank her? No he did not. She's miffed, and wonders if she's being too sensitive. 

We love questions like this: What do gay men actually do with vibrators? 

Our guest is the indomitable E. Jean Carroll. She is a journalist and the author of five books, including a biography of Hunter S. Thompson, and The New York Times bestselling book NOT MY TYPE: One Woman vs. a President. After Donald Trump sexually assaulted her in 1995, she notably beat him in court, twice. She and Dan have a frank, funny convo about the courage it took to face Trump and his legal team, how the assault impacted her sex life, and how most politicians are cowards. Dan and E. Jean clearly love each other, and also divulge an insider advice columnist hack. E. Jean Carroll is a hero and belongs on a votive candle. A little of this interview is on the Micro, and the whole thing is on the Magnum. 

A woman with mental health challenges can't get off when her partners wear condoms. Now she's pregnant, and plans to get an abortion. She feels like a fool for getting into this situation. What are her options in the future and are there other women out there who have the same problem? 



Q@Savage.Love                   206-302-2064



This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 27% off site wide. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Skims Men- find super comfortable, super sexy underwear, socks, t-shirts leggings and more at Skims.com.





Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From age differences to abortion, virgins to vasectomies and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage is a cultural force for sex positivity.

All Hail E. Jean Carroll!

A cute li'l gal worries she just isn't a very convincing dom. How can she use psychology to establish her sexy top role? 

A newly out pan man is ready to dive into gay culture. But he isn't quite ready to shave his pubes! Does he have to?

On the Magnum, Dan chats with novelist and television writer Kashana Cauley. (Author of The Payback and The Survivalists.) They talk about the pleasure of dystopian novels in a dystopian present, on being a clotheshorse, the student debt crisis, setting boundaries in kink and more! 

A very androgynous AFAB person has a ton of pull with both men and women. But they are new to the gay cruising scene and want some tips on navigating those entrancing homo spaces. 



Q@Savage.Love.              206-302-2064



This episode is brought to you by Liberator: makers of pillows, shapes and furniture for new exciting sex. Go to Liberator.com/Savage or type “Savage” into the search bar for private VIP access to deals that are too good to announce on this podcast!

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

This episode is sponsored by SuperPower: Expert Longevity Blood Testing. For a limited time, our listeners get a SuperPower membership for just $199. Go to Superpower.com and use the code “Savage”.







Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From body hair to birth control, asexuality to auto-erotic asphyxiation and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage is a cultural force for sex positivity, when we most need it.

Dan Savage

Savage Lovecast by Dan Savage

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